Who are these people?

"I know of three reasons that people go to coffee houses: to drink coffee, eat pastries, and socialize." Martin Bayer/Quora

On Wednesday our local book group met for lunch in one of our very many local cafés. this is not the one we went to, although it is very similar and just across the road. I chose this photo - not having taken any myself of course - because it showed a crowded typical Melbourne café - both CBD and suburban. As I said, we have several cafés in Eltham and they are, virtually all of them, pretty full at any time of the day or year. They are mostly not tiny, and most of them also have outside areas, where people sometimes even sit in the middle of winter.

Who are these people I often ask myself, and indeed I asked this question of my next door neighbour - a fellow book grouper - because, fortunately it turned out, she often asked the same question herself.

And yet I know for a fact that some of our group are in a local café, often the same one, at least three, possibly more times a week. Why?

Now I know we live in a prosperous suburb, and so people can afford expensive pastries and coffees. There are also a number of retired people who have time to kill, but lots of young people frequent them as well. Young mums - yummy mummies as they used to be known but is a phrase that is probably no longer politically correct. And if not, why not, I ask myself as it's surely a much more sexist, almost lascivious comment than commenting on Taylor Swift's short skirts, only to be told by grandchildren that this is slut shaming.

But I'm drifting away from the topic in hand. I understand the popularity of cafés in the city and in shopping centres. People in those places are busy, and a café is a nice place to grab a few moments of escape from work, or from carrying around heavy bags, as they were today at Doncaster shopping centre which is in the throes of Christmas shopping. But an outer suburb on an ordinary day? One can surely relax at home and most people - in our strata of society at least - have more than adequate ways of making their favourite hot - or cold drinks.

I do indeed note that third reason to go to a café - to socialise. And indeed that is why I was there yesterday, and for the groups of people that you see there this is obviously a reason. But I do know of couples who do this on a regular basis. I sort of assume that they are alone when doing so, but maybe not. Maybe they meet with friends each time they are there. Are they the same friends every day, or different friends on different days.

For me however, this is a special thing. A treat and if indulged in every day, even every other day, would it still be a treat? Would it become an obligation? A chore? Did such regular meet ups begin by accident or design? Do I have any friends with whom I could do this on a regular basis? I suspect not which is perhaps a sad thought.

Of course I could do it on my own, and many people do enjoy sitting in cafés watching the world go by, or for the young, attending to their smart phone lives, or working on their laptops. Occasionally even reading. J. K. Rowling famously wrote Harry Potter in a café and many famous writers maintain that they are a great source of creativity. I do indeed rather like watching the world go by, musing on the lives of the people who surround me, but I am nevertheless not really comfortable doing this and prefer to do it in company. I am much too self-conscious.

Maybe it's just a return to our younger days when at school or university when groups of friends would gather wherever or whenever they could and avidly discuss life, the universe and everything. I certainly remember that university life consisted of time studying and attending lectures and tutorials, time eating and drinking in communal dining halls, bars, cafés and rooms, or simply just sitting around with friends and lovers wherever one happened to be, and time sleeping. Roughly a third of each day on each activity perhaps. So maybe, now that we are old with time on our hands, we should be sitting somewhere nice, drinking good coffee, and eating good food, discussing life the universe and everything with our today friends. Even simply gossiping. On a regular basis. And yet, I cannot shake the feeling that this sort of experience is reserved for special places, special times - like holidays.

And what about the food and the drink? Well Melbourne now has a solid reputation for its coffee with expats such as Curtis Stone saying:

"I love coming home to Melbourne. The first thing I do is have a coffee. It's just so much better here than anywhere else.  It's better than in Italy and I travel a lot.

And yes the coffee was good. The food? Not so good I thought - or maybe it was that nothing appealed. The menu was a pretty typical brunch kind of thing, with lots of salads, eggs, burgers and toast based dishes - not to mention the obligatory acai bowl. The portions were generous - over generous as they often are these days everywhere you go. Which is another thing I simply do not understand. I am pretty sure that most people would be happy with smaller portions - and smaller prices. And there might then be less wastage, even less obesity. Most of the dishes cost in the mid $20 range, the coffees were $4.80 and the really rather disappointing range of pastries I frankly do not know the cost of - $5.00 or so I'm guessing. My scrambled eggs with crab were pretty good - freshly cooked I think and lots of them - there must have been at least three eggs, but with just a very faint taste of crab. I asked for the extra potato rösti rather than the sourdough toast but potato lover that I am I have to say that they were somewhat disappointing. More like a potato cake than a crisp rösti. The service was wonderfully friendly, but then one of our company breakfasts there on a very regular basis and knows all the staff very well.

Of course I enjoyed myself. I do not get to do this kind of thing - a small ordinary pleasure - very often. Possibly I should do it more often with family as well as friends, and my ladies lunches in the city have certainly been a great pleasure. Time for another one after the Christmas rush I think. I confess I feel a little estranged from what is obviously a communal life in which I do not participate. Maybe it's due to English reserve, if such a thing exists. Maybe it's just me. My family and my home is perhaps enough. Perhaps a new year resolution would be to gather local family and a few friends at one of our local venues for a bit of a chill out session every now and then. Once a month? Time seems to fly by so fast these days. One with better food though I think.

LONG TIMES AGO

December 5

2023 - Nothing

2022 - Mint sauce(s)

2021 - Rocky road and some detours

2020 - Garlic

2019 - Your local Indian restaurant

2018 - Ticking all the boxes

2017 - Giardiniera

2016 - Which is the fruit and which is the vegetable?